Transcript of my job interview to be an official newsletter editor

I read that as a writer, it's important to establish a body of work that followers can read and enjoy.  With that in mind, I applied for a job as the editor of the monthly newsletter for the International Television Association.
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"So Dave, you want to be the editor of the International Television Newsletter?"
"You bet."
"What are your qualifications?"
"I've been an International Television Association member for three years."
"Really, we've never seen you at any meetings."
"I'm more of the quiet, 'sit on the sidelines' type of member."
"Oh.  When was the last meeting you attended?"
"March 2007.  But I consistently attend every 36 months."
"Well, if you're going to edit the newsletter, consistency is important.  What was the last thing you wrote?"
"Here......"
"Happy Birthday to my loving wife Linda, Love Dave.   Hmmm - well at least you have a concise, understandable writing style."
"Here's another sample."
"Dear Sirs, Enclosed please find one crushed digital SLR, found under my car tires this past weekend.  I am requesting replacement under the "satisfaction guaranteed" promise in your web advertisement.   Oh - you're a photographer too?
"Sure."
"Can we see some samples of your work?"
"I already thought of that.  I left the memory chip in the camera when I sent it in for repair, but as soon as I get it back I'll send you some pictures."
"We suppose that will have to do.  But an important part of editing a newsletter has to be motivating people.  You'll have to get other members to write articles for you, or you'll go nuts doing the whole job alone.  Do you think you can handle that?"
"That's easy!  I have people writing for me all the time.  I'm great at motivating authors."
"Is that so?  We'd be interested in knowing how you do that."
"I brought some examples to show you.  Here's a good one."
"Dear Friend.  Have you forgotten us?  It's been three months since we've received your last payment......Hmm."
"Would you like to see another one?"
"No thank you, we get the idea."
"Well if you have no more questions, does that mean I get the job?"
"Not exactly Mister Felder.  You don't really have the qualifications we were looking for.  Mind you, we're real impressed with your talents, but if you had just a little experience in writing, editing, managing, administering or photography, we'd probably jump at the opportunity to take you on as our editor."
"I'll work for free."
"Welcome aboard Dave, we're glad to have you here."
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Originally published September 1987.   Hey, it's hard to fill up a new blog with material!